Is there power in negative thinking?

I am 4 days away from my Beta and today is the first day, I feel physically good. Which makes me mentally a mess. My cramps are gone, my boobs are only semi soar, and I am not as tired as I was yesterday.. I am just feeling unbelievably negative and this is depressing me so much. I now don’t want Sunday to come. Mentally I thought I would be able to handle this, but is just isn’t going to be. And to have to wait 4 weeks for a follow-up, that is another cycle going by. It just seems like way to many years away.
And I am not feeling so great about my frozen blasts. Day of transfer, we had 24 left over, but only 8 made it to freeze. That makes me think the 2 they put in were a real guess on the quality. Its like no different then a 3 day. I am just feeling hopeless